May 20, 2008
Kids or Kidneys?
© Photographer: Destinyvispro | Agency: Dreamstime.com
"....just as charitable organizations rely on private "gifts" from anonymous donors, parents who give the gift of adoption also have a reasonable right to remain anonymous."
I woke up this morning to find the article below in the Washington Post...still half-awake here, but appalled at the amazing disregard and obvious slant of the writer of this letter. Everything the person says is blatantly in disregard of the adult adoptee AND even the first family. Research has found that an overwhelming number of birth mothers DO NOT WANT CONFIDENTIALITY. They HAD NO CHOICE in most cases because "sealed records" laws were originally implemented to protect the newly formed adoptive family ~ NOT the birthmother. If a birthmother gives up a child for adoption, but for some reason the child is never adopted, but remains in foster care, for example, the child's birth certificate is NEVER sealed. The birthmother's "anonymity" is non-existant. State Supreme Courts have ruled that birthmothers are not promised perpetual anonymity under the law.
But even if it was the case, think about it for a moment ~ WHY should the 'right' of one adult be held in higher regard than the right of an adult adoptee and their children after them to know their IDENTITY? Adoptees are not perpetual children, yet we are regarded as such under the law.
I wrote the above two paragraphs reluctantly, because I didn't even want to waste my time reiterating what has already been written in the literature and supported by the Child Welfare League of America for years ~ unconditional open records for adult adoptees. But I wrote it, so I'll leave it.
The most LUDICROUS part of the letter in the Washington Post is the fact that adult adoptees are pretty much compared to a donated organ!!!!! What????? I couldn't believe what I read at first. But there is was.
We are the GIFT to "charitable" organizations made by 'anonymous' donors (birthmothers who don't ask for confidentiality, but are held to it by "sealed record" laws lobbied for by the 'charitable organizations' themselves ~ the adoption agencies, attorneys, and brokers who work on behalf of their customers ~ the adoptive parents who pay good money for their 'children').
This letter is SO OBVIOUS in revealing the true reason for "sealed records" ~ the GIFT of a child to "selfless" adoptive parents ~ selfless adoptive parents who remain on waiting lists for years to get the chance to pay entire life-savings for a "healthy infant" and yet bypass the thousands of foster children whose entire childhood waits. "Selfless" may not be the word I would use here.
So, I hate to break it to you, oh writer of the letter, but adult adoptees are HUMAN BEINGS ~ we aren't some body part that have no voice, rights, or pain, that can be "donated" to "charity" (a billion-dollar a year industry doesn't quite fit the definition for "charitable" anyway). Since when did infertility become a "charity" at the expense of human rights?