January 23, 2008

The GIFT Speaks

I went to a local "Adoption Forum" meeting last night which consists of adoption "professionals." They open the meeting to those of us in the "triad" ~ how special.

Anyway, they were praising the beauty of open adoption and how ALL the problems that adoptees and first mothers have can be blamed on closed adoptions. They fail to acknowledge two things ~
1) Open adoption does not eliminate the "primal wound" that infants/human-beings
suffer when taken from their mother and only source of security/identity.
2) Open adoption does NOTHING about the closed RECORD system that is STILL intact in
American government. Amended (falsified) birth certificates STILL replace our
true record of birth, which is sealed in the adoption court system.

BUT ~ my biggest pet-peeve is THIS ~ I'm supposedly some kind of "Gift" ~ Since when is it kosher for a human-being to be GIVEN as a GIFT to strangers? And is this supposed to suffice for my rights and needs that are disregarded in the entire picture? Because my adoptive parents consider me the GIFT of a life-time, the first mothers are held on some pedastool (until finalization at least) for being "heroes" for giving such a PRECIOUS GIFT to some deserving couple who desperately suffers from the "misunderstood" grief of infertility?????? So the adoptee is the ANSWER to this?????? Yes, the voiceless, helpless infant's identity, security, and heritage (as well as their children's after them) is forfeited in order to be GIFTED to those who must SAVE for their own needs to be met?

No ~ You give personalized pen sets, cars, keyrings, and sweaters ~ but a human-being is not a GIFT ~ ever.

I so wanted to share this knowledge last night....oh, and I also wanted to ask why the GIFT is transferred to the tune of 15,000 bucks per whop?


Chris said...

right on, peach! my first time at your blog....thanks for writing!
I can't do any groups that include adoption professionals anymore...I just can't contain myself and end up scaring everyone!

Lioness said...

Great post! I think that grates on all adoptees. Here's what I wrote when I confronted the transaction issue: http://whosefacestares.blogspot.com/2013/11/purchased-bought-sold-and-treated-like.html